Round 2

I have not updated with what is going on in our lives because as quick as I can type what is going on in our lives I need to hit the backspace key because our plan of action has changed.

Last week we were dealt awful news. Derrik's MRI revealed a tear in his UCL. His UCL is what he had repaired last year (Tommy John Surgery). It was awful news to take in, lots of tears on my part, comprehending we would spend a whole other year in rehab, knowing we would miss not only all of this season but part of next. We spent the rest of that day feeling sorry for ourselves, being fustrated, talking to those who mean the most to us asking for their opinion, and by the next morning picked up the pieces and began moving forward.

We had a big decision to make. We had multiple decisions we could make in regards to Derriks career, but I think both whole-heartedly feel we need to continue to push forward with this. We both know it can work and have seen many teammates come back perfectly fine from this. One of the guys playing for the Reds has had the surgery three times! I will forever question why Derrik? Why his arm? Why are we suppose to do two years of rehab?

I know there are bigger reasons for this. Maybe as a family we are meant to be out there on our own. Maybe it'll make us even stronger, closer, and even more in love then we are now. I know we grew so much as a family out there on our own this past year.

Where do we stand right now? At a stand still. The doctor in Arizona and the tech who reads MRIs in Arizona see a tear, but the head doctor in Cincinnati (who did the last surgery) says he does not see it. We are very fustrated because last year when the doc in Cincinnati read the MRI he said he did not see a tear either when it was indeed torn. Derrik's arm is a mess, feels awful, and we feel as if this surgery is indeed going to happen its just a matter of politics being sorted out at this point. I was waiting for some definite answers before putting this all in writing, but it seems it may take anotehr week or so to sort out and did not want to leave our family and friends in the dark.

We are trying to keep our heads up, but I'm such a planner at heart. I tell Derrik I can handle any living situation (location, length of time, furnished, unfurnished) as long as i'm given some sort of plan. Right now I have nothing and my mind can not handle that. We had an apartment all lined up to move into, but were then told the doctor is wanting to wait on surgery. It's so fustrating constantly trying to rearrange our lives off of someones opinion they took two seconds to make.

At the moment I am trying to keep myself busy with the present day. It seems to be all I can prepare for so I have to be content with that. I'm taking my sister and a bunch of her friends to the midnight showing of Eclipse tonight, going to the first Chatham Anglers game of the season(Formerly Chatham A's... the team Derrik played for when we met), going to a band concert in Chatham on Friday, going to the parade on Saturday, and celebrating the 4th! Hoping all of this can keep me busy until we get some answers.

Ugh Oh!

One Year Ago

One year ago today Derrik and I were in Cincinnati getting a consult for surgery on his arm.

Today Derrik was sitting in a doctors office getting a consult for surgery on his arm.

Derrik's velocity has been down since he began playing in games for his rehab. The delay in him being placed with a team had a lot to do with this. When he returned back to Arizona from his short trip to visit in Cape Cod his arm hurt really bad. He hasn't thrown since that happened last Monday. He took some medication the Reds prescribed to knock out any inflammation and threw again yesterday from only 45 feet.... still pain.

That led to him getting x-rays today which later revealed a large bone spur in his elbow.

Shock, upset, frustrated, confusion.... It's a wide range of emotions that I feel right now. The idea of another surgery,moving back out to Arizona, and more rehab makes me nauseous.

Derrik will get an MRI tomorrow morning to make sure everything looks great from his Tommy John surgery. There is no reason to think anything is wrong, but they feel like they should take precautionary measures if they are going back into his elbow anyhow. After that we should be getting a date for the surgery.

If it is just a bone spur then it is a scope surgery (minimally invasive). It would be a about a six to eight week rehab with some time after that to get his arm back in pitching condition. It would put us right into the final week or so of the season. There are some options after that in the baseball world (i'm sure all you baseball wives out there can think of all the different options... instructs, fall ball, winter ball, minor league playoffs), but I won't get into them as they are all slightly confusing. I will explain later when we see what options come our way. For now though we have to get his arm fixed. I told Derrik after this i'd prefer to never see the inside of his arm ever again!

I will keep everyone posted as far as travel and surgery dates... I don't think i'll sleep much with all of this going though my mind!

Happy Father's Day

I want to wish a very Happy Father's Day to all the Fathers in my life!

Daddy we would be lost without you! Thank you so much for always supporting me and my family in all the decisions we make. We are forever grateful for the love and support you offer us!

Ronnie, Tom, Papa (Bennett), and Papa (Lutz) we love you all very much and thank you also for supporting us, backing us through the highs and lows, and all you do for us.

Derrik-
Thank you so much for being such an amazing father to our little man. I knew you'd be a great dad, but never knew just how amazing you would be. I love nothing more then when you tell me you love Ryder, and then reiterate how much you really love him... melts my heart! We are so sad we can't be with you this father's day, but promise we will have many happy days ahead that will make up for this time. Ryder and I love you so so much!!!

Ryder and Daddy in the hospital the day after Ryder was born

Daddy and Ryder last Father's Day
My boys last week

Beautiful Blogger Award

Liz over at Tickled Pink(http://babyabigailgrace.blogspot.com/) awarded me with the Beautiful Blogger Award. Liz is someone I just recently found in blog world through the baseball wives blog, and we have so much in common! She lives in Florida, has a little one, and a husband that is a pitcher. They are currently also in rehab... no surgery for them yet and praying it stays that way for them! I'm loving all their updates on how they are managing to survive baseball with a family too :)


This award comes with a few rules.... thank those that gave this award to you and tell seven things about yourself that readers may not already know.
So here you go!

1. I love ice cream! Like REALLY love it!!! I could eat it at every meal if it wouldn't make me gain so much weight.I do eat it almost every night though and should probably stop pronto. My two favorites are Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough and Mint Chocolate Chip! YUM!!!

2. I have a sick obsession with reality tv... or maybe just tv in general. Some favorites that are on right now are The Bachelorette (Cheering on Chris L. and Roberto), The Hills, The City, Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami. I also love Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice, and Flash Forward. I can't wait until the fall when they all come back on!

3. I keep my fridge super neat. I never knew this about myself until my friends made a huge deal out of it last spring training. Everything has it's spot and labels always have to be kept facing forward.

4. I want to be more talented and keep promising myself to do so. I want to learn to sew cute clothes, become a amateur photographer, and learn to make amazing digital scrapbooks for Ryder. I also tell myself I will "soon".... hopefully "soon" isn't when Ryder is graduating high school.

5. I despise deep cleaning a home. I can show a good front by keeping things tidy and in order, but I hate to do a deep clean! (I guess everyone does)Luckily we always have to pay cleaning fees when we move into rental homes, and we always move quick enough before that "deep clean" becomes necessary :)

6. I love Christmas now more for the cold weather, getting my family all into one place, taking Ryder to see Santa, making yummy breakfasts, Christmas carols, baking cookies, cozy nights by the fire with the Christmas tree lit up, and getting Christmas cards from friends and family then the actual presents.

7. I broke my nose in high school racing BMX. Most people find the BMX (bike racing) part interesting. I raced for about ten years and got to travel all over the country with it. It made for an amazing childhood. Anyhow... I had just started my freshman year of high school, and I broke my nose after a crash and had to have surgery to fix it. I had to walk around high school with bandages on my nose which was extremely embarrasing, and it still left a bump on my nose! Talk about traumatizing!!!

Now I get to pass this award on .....

I'm passing the award onto the following Blog Friends:

Rachel over at Family of Eyres

http://familyofeyres.blogspot.com/

Rachel is also a new special find from the baseball wives blog. I'm considering her a super mom that i'd like to follow in the footsteps of. Not only is she a baseball momma, but she is a baseball momma times three! Plus... we graduated from the same high school and they live in the same town I grew up in! Crazy how blog world has come full circle on me. I'd also love to bump into this baseball Mommy sometime because she sews the cutest clothes for her kids. I'd so love to have her teach me because i've been wanting to pick up this hobby for a long long time!

Sarah over at The Gardella's

http://babygardella.blogspot.com/

I somehow stumbled up Sarah's blog through blog stalking i'm sure. It has been such a great read watching her little man grow up. I am always jealous of the great group of Mommy friends she has. They live in Kentucky so i'm so meeting up with her (wonder if she knows that?! HAHA) when Derrik makes it to AAA so I can have some Mommy friends too :)

Tricia over at The Hustedts

http://azhustedtfamily.blogspot.com/

Tricia was my saving grace while living in Arizona. You might have seen some pictures of her sweet little girl Page on our blog a time or two. I found her through a mom website, and we totally hit it off. She runs an in home daycare, and Ryder and I loved visiting them some afternoons. Ryder would play with the kids, and i'd get to hold the babies while getting some adult talk time. Perfect match if you ask me!!! They are expecting a second little one at the end of the year, and I'm so excited to be able to add Baby Hustedt to the list of little ones we get to meet at spring training next year!

Doing Summer

We have had such a gorgoues week here in The Cape. Ryder has lived outside. We have been wearing out bathing suits, coating on sunscreen, and going through oddles of swimmer diapers. To say we are enjoying this beautiful weather is an understatement.

Yesterday we finally made it down for a real pond day. We had seen it a few times, but hadn't had much success with weather. My mom and I met up with two moms from Hailey's class with their three little boys. Ryder was finally surrounded by boys! They were a couple years older then him and weren't thrilled over the distruction Ryder could do to their "fish pond" they were making. They kept throwing toys for Ryder to chase after, but Ryder had no clue they were trying to get him and his destructive ways away from their creation. He was in heaven when he thought they were playing with him.

Feeding some of the baby ducks at the pond

Modeling
First smile while looking at the camera in a long time!

At about 2:15 the moms were rushing to pack their stuff to go pick their girls up from school. They had changed their boys into their dry clothes and turned their backs to get their belongings together. We heard one of the boys screaming from behind an old wooden fence "I found a frog!"

Do you see the size of that thing?!

The boys pants were all soaked, and the frog peed on the little boy!!! Really shows me what i'm in for in the years to come!!!

We went home to find out Grandpa wanted to head to the nursery to pick out some flowers for his yard. We were still in post-pond clothes and it suddenly got cold and rainy requiring a hoodie. Ignore Ryder's mismatched outfit

Helping grandpa with the cart

"Pussssshhhhh"

He said this the whole way home. He absolutley loved pushing this card around

Enjoying the swings

We swing high on the big boy swings these days

Today Hailey's class had a field trip to the public beach. My mom insisted we met them down there to let Ryder play, and I'm so glad we did. As soon as I told Ryder where we were going he just kept saying "beach" over and over. The water was out as far as the eye could see so it left lots of water puddles to splash around in with fiddler crabs, shrimp, crabs, and minnows to catch. Ryder was in heaven being at the beach and playing with a whole class full of kids.

My little man at the beach

We came home and Grandpa was ready to plant his flowers so we hung out in the yard. We indulged in some watermelon, which has been a big favorite of ours lately, and played with Ryder's bike. We bought him a Radio Flyer bike a while back and it's his favorite toy. Problem being he just pushes it everywhere. Maybe next summer he'll actually ride it :)

Daddy's Visit

Derrik was here with us on The Cape this weekend..... and it was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! Who know that having my husband around with us for a weekend would be such a precious gift. I guess I took it for granted through this rehab process so far.

On Thursday morning I went in to get Ryder up out of bed. I was changing his diaper on the changing table and told him I had a surprise for him. Ryder ripped his paci out of his mouth and shouted, "DA!". I had told Ryder for the few days before that his Daddy was coming to visit, but he never seem to really grasp the concept. I said, "Yeah baby... Da is laying in Mommy's bed". We rushed down the hallway and Ryder tried leaning over to kiss the picture of Derrik he has been kissing since we got here. I once again told him that his Da was in Mommy's bed and went into the bedroom. I was so nervous that his reaction would be bad. I was nervous he wouldn't go to Derrik or would just walk the other direction. I was so wrong! I crawled into bed with Ryder and said "Look Ryder... That's your Daddy!". The largest grin I have ever seen erupted on Ryder's face as he leaned in and hugged his Daddy for as long as I've ever seen him hug! You couldn't wipe the smile off of Ryder's face if you tried. We all laid in bed watching tv together, and Ryder kept sitting up to hug and kiss Derrik. He was one happy boy to have his Da back in his life... even if it was for only a few days!

My boys watching T.V. their first morning together

I have no pictures from that day. It was nasty and raining out. We went and got breakfast, came home for Ryder's nap, we napped (we got home at about 2 a.m. from the airport), we hung out, grabbed some dinner, played, and went to bed. Nothing too exciting, but still exciting because we got to do it all with Derrik :)

Friday morning was gorgeous out! We went and grabbed some donuts at Dunkin Donuts and played down at the beach for a little while.

Enjoying some breakfast on the beach

My Boys!
Sharing some of his donut with his Daddy

Not so sure of this water when his Aunties' aren't playing in it with him

An attempt at a family shoot.... oops

Ryder walking Daddy down to the water

I'm pretty sure they were discussing how cold the water was here

We had a first happen to us while Derrik was visiting.... boy do I feel sooo awful about this one! Ryder got his first sunburn :( My family is constantly making fun of me for how much suntan lotion i'm constantly lathering on him to keep him safe, but it just didn't cross my mind at the beach. We were there for like a half hour and it was pretty chilly out. Ryder also usually has a surf shirt on, but I only packed his one bathing suit for our "short stay" up here because it was still cold when we arrived. Who knew we'd be in bathing suits a couple times a week at this point! When we got home Ryder wanted to go outside so bad with his aunties' and their friends that were over for the night. I didn't know what to do because he could not take anymore sun....

Uncle Ryan's solution to the problem

Uncle Ryan brought his 4-wheeler up for the summer

Ryder got to go on a short ride up and down the drive way

On Saturday we had plans on taking the boat out to see the whales. It was suppose to rain so we decided to just go out on the lake and do some tubing. By the time we go out there it was raining, but we decided to go anyhow.

Ally, Jenny, Tanner, and Sarah

Ryder showing his Da some love while on the boat
I'm one lucky girl to be able to call him my husband :)

Love Him!

Uncle Ryan and Auntie Hailey

Ryder taking over for a little while

On Sunday Ryder, Derrik, and I went to grab some breakfast before we needed to head to the airport. While in the car I pointed to Derrik and asked Ryder who this was. He responded Dad-dy!!! FINALLY!!! Derrik has been Da for so many months now, and Ryder just refused to add anything else onto it! Definitely a great going away gift for Derrik :)

Derrik had an awful trip home. His orginal flight was delayed, then cancelled, then his new flight was delayed which caused him to miss his connection. He had to sleep in the Las Vegas airport! I don't think it was how he envisioned his first trip to Las Vegas that's for sure! He just got home, showered, and has a couple of hours to sleep before he has to report back to the field this afternoon. Now it's back to baseball, back to rehab, and back to waiting for something to happen.... we'll keep you updated!

Going Off the Radar....

Our Daddy is at the airport

We are going to have three whole days with him with no baseball!

Blogging will be the last thing on our mind!

So I figured i'd share these pictures

of the little man

to hold you over for the weekend!!!



P.S. - Uncle Ryan will be here for the weekend too!!!

"When Life Throw You Lemons, Make Lemonade"

The Lemons:

Well i'm sad to report that Ryder and I are still in Cape Cod, and Derrik is still out in Arizona rehabbing. When Ryder and I left over a month ago we never anticipated that we would be apart for this long. The time frame we were given, after Derrik's surgery, for Derrik to be back with a team was the beginning of May until the end of June. We waited until he started throwing in games again to make sure he felt fine, and then packed our bags and headed to my parents with the anticipation that a move would be made in days or at the most a few weeks. I've learned in the baseball world to never anticipate anything!!! As I write this today I have not seen my husband in a month and two days.

Ryder and I are truly enjoying ourselves with my family, but that doesn't matter because we miss our hubby and daddy so so much! Derrik on the other hand is at the baseball field every day, dealing with temperatures well above one hundred degrees, and had to move AGAIN! The owner of the house the guys he moved in with wouldn't renew the lease after the first of this month. Thank God Derrik had been doing baseball lessons for a boy with a really sweet family who has taken him and all our stuff in until he is with a team again.

Derrik's arm feels great. He threw back to back days this week for the first time, and did amazing in both games. We were beyond fustrated that he was still in rehab, and were not getting any answers as to when he would be sent with a team or what he needed to do different. Finally on Friday we got some answers and are trying to feel at peace with them. The Reds have basically said that have not put Derrik on the back burner. They have told us they value him as a player very highly and want to protect him until they feel he is at the best of his ability so he can do good things for them in the future. His velocity when he started pitching in games was the low 80s, for the past two weeks hes been steady at 85, and just Friday hit 86! Only a little further to go and he'll be back where he was, but they don't want Derrik to push himself so that takes time. That still leaves our family on seperate sides of the country with an indefinate timeline on when we will be together again.

The Lemonade:

With the minor league draft coming up the rehab and extended spring training guys out in Arizona get next Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday off! Yes, you heard me right... FOUR FULL DAYS OFF! We bought Derrik a ticket to fly out Wednesday afternoon, and he is with us until Sunday afternoon. I seriously feel like Christmas is coming this week!!! By the time Derrik gets here this week I will have not seen him for five weeks and one days which beats our all time high of five weeks apart when we first meet and were dating. To say I am excited to see Derrik doesn't even do it justice!

We live on Cape Cod, which is known for it's amazing beaches and amazing summers! Unfortunately whenever we are here as a family it is freezing and snow is on the ground. The only time we've ever been able to spend summer time together was the amazing summer we met... seriously amazing enough I feel like you could write a movie! It was the best summer of my life! This week we will get to share that again... with Ryder! We are going to soak up all the family-time-on-Cape-Cod-Mini-Vacation time we can this week!!!

"When life throws you lemons, make lemonade"

iPhone Picture Update

I had a huge collection of pictures from over the weekend off my phone and thought i'd share.

Ryder is OBSESSED with shoes! It's probably one of his best words that he says, and he takes the opportunity to put them on whenever they are around

Sporting Grandpa's dress shoes

He insisted on carrying his big box of cars he begged Grandpa for at the store.

Mommy and Grammy said no so he brought them to Grandpa, held the box up, and said "tease" (please)... so of course he got them! He has Grandpa SOOO wrapped around his finger.
Ryder gets very mad if we don't play his Usher OMG song in the car.
This is him protesting Grandpa's old man music

Then he crashed... so did his Auntie Ally

At my cousin Adam's graduation party Ryder took it upon himself to test the cake out before it was time

Only the coolest Aunties come home from school and make forts with thier nephews