I have not updated with what is going on in our lives because as quick as I can type what is going on in our lives I need to hit the backspace key because our plan of action has changed.
Last week we were dealt awful news. Derrik's MRI revealed a tear in his UCL. His UCL is what he had repaired last year (Tommy John Surgery). It was awful news to take in, lots of tears on my part, comprehending we would spend a whole other year in rehab, knowing we would miss not only all of this season but part of next. We spent the rest of that day feeling sorry for ourselves, being fustrated, talking to those who mean the most to us asking for their opinion, and by the next morning picked up the pieces and began moving forward.
We had a big decision to make. We had multiple decisions we could make in regards to Derriks career, but I think both whole-heartedly feel we need to continue to push forward with this. We both know it can work and have seen many teammates come back perfectly fine from this. One of the guys playing for the Reds has had the surgery three times! I will forever question why Derrik? Why his arm? Why are we suppose to do two years of rehab?
I know there are bigger reasons for this. Maybe as a family we are meant to be out there on our own. Maybe it'll make us even stronger, closer, and even more in love then we are now. I know we grew so much as a family out there on our own this past year.
Where do we stand right now? At a stand still. The doctor in Arizona and the tech who reads MRIs in Arizona see a tear, but the head doctor in Cincinnati (who did the last surgery) says he does not see it. We are very fustrated because last year when the doc in Cincinnati read the MRI he said he did not see a tear either when it was indeed torn. Derrik's arm is a mess, feels awful, and we feel as if this surgery is indeed going to happen its just a matter of politics being sorted out at this point. I was waiting for some definite answers before putting this all in writing, but it seems it may take anotehr week or so to sort out and did not want to leave our family and friends in the dark.
We are trying to keep our heads up, but I'm such a planner at heart. I tell Derrik I can handle any living situation (location, length of time, furnished, unfurnished) as long as i'm given some sort of plan. Right now I have nothing and my mind can not handle that. We had an apartment all lined up to move into, but were then told the doctor is wanting to wait on surgery. It's so fustrating constantly trying to rearrange our lives off of someones opinion they took two seconds to make.
At the moment I am trying to keep myself busy with the present day. It seems to be all I can prepare for so I have to be content with that. I'm taking my sister and a bunch of her friends to the midnight showing of Eclipse tonight, going to the first Chatham Anglers game of the season(Formerly Chatham A's... the team Derrik played for when we met), going to a band concert in Chatham on Friday, going to the parade on Saturday, and celebrating the 4th! Hoping all of this can keep me busy until we get some answers.